MADONNA

MADONNA
EXPLICITLY 4 "ICONERS"!

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Comparing the U.S. Budget to a Family Budget



I read the following Daily Kos article the other morning.  It's an interesting read.

You want to compare the U.S. budget to a family budget?  Let’s be real about it.
By Laura Clawson
Daily Kos
I saw someone sharing one of these notions that seems like basic common sense, until you start thinking about it and realize that common sense is often more common than sense. The claim was that you can put the fiscal cliff—the federal budget, really—in better perspective by taking eight zeroes off the end of a series of numbers and thinking of it as a family budget. Now, families and governments actually aren't a good comparison, as economists (and common sense, if that's your speed) would tell you. But since a lot of people find this basic idea a powerful comparison, let's think about what if the United States was a big extended family living under one roof with one budget.

Annual family income: $21,700
Money the family spent: $38,200
New debt on the credit card: $16,500
Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710
Budget cuts so far: $38.50

First off, this set of numbers tips its hand by only talk about cutting budgets, not increasing income for this fictional family. Which is interesting, because one of the big problems the America-family has is that a bunch of rich relatives are living in the house not doing their fair share to cover expenses. We've got an uncle who's down in the kitchen all the time telling the rest of us to eat nothing but beans and rice because we can't afford fresh vegetables and meat, and telling us to turn down the heat in the house if we're having trouble covering the power bill. And no, he's not going to share his giant steak because it's his and he bought it with his own money. But meanwhile, we're paying the electric bill for that space heater he's always running in his room, because he's not gonna be cold even if the rest of us are. And we're paying the gas bill for cooking that steak he didn't share. So a big part of that spending problem we allegedly have is that some people aren't acting like we're a family where everyone contributes to the income side.

Another part of why our family budget is hurting is that the factory in town that a couple of family members made a good living working at for years or even decades closed down. Now sister's still unemployed and the best job dad could find was working at Staples for $9 an hour. And since the factory closed, he lost his pension and may never be able to retire. As a matter of fact, it was friends of rich-space-heater-uncle who closed the factory, and we're pretty sure he made some money in the deal himself. Doesn't stop him lecturing us about why we're struggling, though.
Next, a bunch of the debt we took on last year was investing in our future. One of the kids is college age and we thought it was worth taking on some student loans to invest in her future. We feel sure when she graduates, she'll do her best to contribute to the family budget. We think in the long run, she'll be able to contribute more to the family's bottom line with a college degree than if she just started working at Walmart right now, but, well, right now that investment is debt on our balance sheet. But that's what families do—they invest for the future and try to ensure that the kids have the brightest possible future.

We also took out a small-business loan to expand a little furniture-making business one of the brothers started out of the garage. With better equipment and a small advertising budget, we're hopeful he'll be able to grow the business and provide jobs for a couple of other family members who've only been able to get part-time work.
We've also been having a family debate about whether to put a little more money into the house, actually. See, there was a big storm and a tree fell through the roof. Most of the bedrooms are fine, but two of them are really badly damaged. Some of us think all the members of the family deserve to have mold-free walls and roofs without gaping holes, but others aren't so sure and think maybe the people in those rooms ought to be on their own to recover from a tree coming through their roofs and crushing their stuff. We're hoping to win this one by reminding everyone that the people in those rooms have good jobs and pay more than their share of the bills most of the time. If they get too sick to work or have to take time off work to figure out how to fix things, the whole family will be financially weaker for it. We'll see how that one goes, but I sure think the whole house and the whole family will be weaker if we don't try to shore up after a disaster.

So, yeah, it's been a tough year what with the storm and all the rich relatives living in our house, running up the bills, but only contributing like 13 percent of their money to the family budget while a lot of us with much less money are contributing more like 30 percent. We're trying to invest for the future, though, and fighting to get those rich relatives to contribute a little more to the family budget. We'll see how things go with that, but meanwhile, it's not helpful to just strip the numbers down without any context for why we took in so little, or why we spent what we did.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Pope Benedict Takes Anti-Gay Marriage To New Level

"When freedom to be creative becomes the freedom to create oneself, then necessarily the Maker himself is denied and ultimately man too is stripped of his dignity as a creature of God."--Pope Benedict 

This message of hate comes to you from the leader who condoned and then hid child-rape for decades...excuse me if I don't cede the moral high ground to you.  To be clear, people choose their religion, people are born gay. It's not the other way around. 

SCREW YOU BENNY!


Pope Gay Marriage
THIS IS A PHOTO OF A VERY EVIL MAN!!!!!!!!

A New Beginning

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Happy 21st Birthday, Felicia!


Happy birthday to D's niece!  It never ceases to amaze me how fast she grew up before our very eyes.  I have known her for most of her life.  She's a beautiful young woman with a heart of gold.  We are very proud of her!

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

I'M BACK!

As the title of my post indicates, I'm back!  I've been gone for a long time.  After Mom's passing last year, I did not--could not--find the desire to write.  It seemed futile.  I have had too much on my plate to think about writing.  Now, we're nearing the close of 2012 and approaching a new year:  2013.  In view of 2011 and 2012, I wonder what 2013 will bring.  Many are biting their nails thinking about the number 13, but I have never been the superstitious sort.  I think the year--any year--will be what you make of it.  
We often blame circumstances for our place in life rather than looking at the one thing we can control no matter the circumstances.  Think about the song "Hotel California" by the Eagles for a minute.  There is a line in the song that goes “You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave."  People "check out" of life when they stop having a passion for life and put their lives on “automatic pilot.”  They have “checked out” but still function waiting for the next event or the next day.  I am reminded of how my colleague put it.  When she was referring to her life, she said:  "I'm only existing, not living." The unfortunate thing and also the wonderful hope is we can check back in!  
Remember Victor Frankl!  Who is Victor Frankl?  Frankl is the famed psychiatrist who wrote an inspirational book, "Man’s Search for Meaning.” Frankl was a prisoner in the Nazi concentration camps. He had been separated from his family with little hope of ever seeing them again.  The conditions brought him near death and he saw those around him marched to the gas chambers. What drove him to survive?  In Frankl’s situation, he had a burning desire to do two things:  be reunited with his family and to disprove a theory by Sigmund Freud. Freud theorized that if you strip away everything that makes us human--our identity, family, our hope--we will revert to an animalistic state.  Frankl refused to believe this theory.  He believed that there was a power within each person to want to help and make a difference and he saw it throughout the camps.  The most powerful statement in the book was:  “When everything is taken away from us, the one thing we can control is our attitude in any given circumstance.”
So what is “the one thing” you need?  It is your ability to choose how you will react to the failures and difficulties in life.  You can blame them on others, on luck, or destiny but in truth it really does not matter.  You can control the outcome by never “checking out.”  If you were passed over for a promotion, demoted, divorced or faced uncontrollable circumstances, you still had the ability to believe in your own future and to be the architect of your own life.  Remember, you are the master of your fate through taking responsibility for your life and working to be the best!
The new year is almost here.  Resolve to make it the best year yet.  
With the new year, there is always a new baby.   Take a look at the latest addition to our family!

Friday, June 1, 2012

Remembering...one year later...

R.I.P. Terrie (January 31, 1967-May 30, 2011):  Last year, on Memorial Day, my former life partner took her own life.  She was 44-years-old.  The tragic news shook my world.  I still find it disheartening.   It makes me sad that you felt totally hopeless with no will to live. 


Monday, May 28, 2012

Lots on my plate...

Last Friday, I was offered a job and I accepted.  It's a contingent job offer.  A background check has to be conducted.  It definitely pays better than where I'm working now and the benefits are good.  It's kind of bittersweet though.  For now, this is all that needs to be said.

The San Antonio Spurs are doing great.  After sweeping the last two teams in the Playoffs, they are now competing against the Oklahoma City Thunder.  The Spurs won the first game of the series last night.  It wasn't pretty, but it's a W nevertheless and I will take it.  The Thunder is a team not to be taken lightly.
The next game is played May 29th.

Alex is almost out of school.  Her high school graduation is this Saturday, June 2nd at 4:00 p.m.  I'm disappointed because I don't get to attend since each family is given a certain amount of tickets.  I understand that she wants her aunts to attend, but I'm still disappointed (but not surprised).  After all, I have attended more of Alex's school functions than any of her aunts...Field Day, choir performances, award ceremonies, UIL competition out-of-town, joined the PTA year after year, the Book Fair, the Xmas Shoppe, dressed up as Pooh and read a storybook to her class......and at least one aunt is lucky enough to have the one spot I would love to have.  Oh well.  No sense in stewing over it.  I guess it really doesn't matter what one does.  In the final analysis, I'm proud of her.  She's graduating from the better high school.

There's also strife in D's family.  Some people just don't get it...never have...never will.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CATY!!

Happy birthday to our wonderful cat who is 5-years-old today (37 in human years).  Converting between cat years and human years isn't as simple as using a factor of 7 (as some people erroneously think with dogs, and sometimes cats). The main reason is that cats mature quickly in the first couple of years of life. To convert cat age to an equivalent human age, an accepted method is to add 15 years for the first year of life. Then add 10 years for the second year of life. After that, add 4 years for every cat year. This means that by year two, a cat has matured to about the same as a 25 year old human. According to The Cat Calculator, she is 37 in human years!   
A few interesting facts: the longest-living cat was 34 years old according to some sources. The Siamese and the Manx breeds are the longest-living cats on average. And keeping your cat indoors typically doubles its lifespan! So I guess we will be having Caty in our lives for a very long time since she is an indoor cat.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

One Day At A Time....

It's been a few days since Mom's passing.  The funeral services were beautiful.  D and I spent Saturday night at Mom's house, which was...I don't know...awkward I suppose.  I see Mom in every room.  It just doesn't seem like Mom's place anymore.  I can't hear her walking around in the kitchen.  I can't hear her reciting her prayers.  I can't smell her.  Periodically, I imagined her walking into the living room and sitting down in her rocker to talk.  At times, I wanted to cry but decided to snap out of it and remain strong for the others.  D has been a real trooper.  She hurts and see it in her eyes, but she is taking things one day at a time.  In the meantime, I will continue to be by her side and get her through this ordeal.  I miss her mother, too.


















Friday, November 18, 2011

Eva Moreno Dominguez, September 2, 1934 - November 17, 2011

D's mom passed yesterday.  I find it difficult to believe she is gone.  For now, it's all about D.

The above photo was taken by me.  I LOVE THIS PHOTO OF EVA. 
I love you Eva.  You were like a mother to me and I miss you dearly.  For now, I will be by your baby girl's side and support her and give her what she needs.  On that you can rest assured.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

BACK WITH MORE!!!

I'm back from what seems like a decade-long hiatus.  It wasn't my intention to neglect my blog as long as I did, but as the saying goes, shit happens.

Since August, D's mom celebrated her 77th birthday.  Needless to say, we were elated about that since we weren't sure about a lot of things since her mom's cancer diagnosis back in February.  Her mom is a fighter.  I celebrated (in silence) my 43rd birthday on October 3rd.  No big deal.  It's just another day in the life as I see it.  I know age is nothing more than a number, but for me personally, it's a reminder of how many years I have lived on this earth and I have yet to accomplish goals I had set on my "Goals" list.  I guess it's true what they say, there never seems to be enough time or time waits for no one or time flies by.  I am reminded of what John Lennon sang in his song:  Life happens when you're busy making other plans.  So true!  I know we all have more control over our lives than we care to admit, but I'm still saddened to think that I may not accomplish everything I had set out to accomplish.  I've already lived half of my life.  Another 43 years and I will be 86.  OMFG!!!!!  I will be 86 years old and that's if I live that long anyway since we are not guaranteed the next hour, or minute, or second.  Change the channel!!!!

Politics is more of the same.  I'm not totally happy with Obama, but I certainly would never consider voting for a Republican, especially the loser candidates who think they have what it takes to be the leader of the free world (and I use the term "free" loosely).  

In the world of entertainment, Michael Jackson's doctor was found "guilty" of involuntary manslaughter for Jackson's death.  What a bunch of horse shit!  To be sure, the doctor clearly made some bad decisions, but the person ultimately responsible for Jackson's death was Jackson himself.  He was an addict to pain medication.  He knew the risks and yet, he wanted the drugs.  Karma came back to bite him in the ass!

In sports, there is a somewhat related story.  Penn State's head coach Joe Paterno was fired.  Evidently, he knew about the child sexual abuse that had taken place on campus, perpetrated by his former assistant coach, and did not report the incidents (more than one folks) to law enforcement.  Was the Board of Trustees justified in firing Joe Pa?  Absolutely!  However, they need to fire everyone else as well:  McQueary, the then grad student who witnessed the incident.  Needless to say, most of the student body as well as other supporters are angry about the termination of Joe Pa.  They're all crying foul.  I'm not shocked.  But here's why I think this story is somewhat related to the Jackson case.  There are those in my family, as well as D's, that think Joe Pa got what he deserved.  (I agree.)  The problem I have with them crucifying Joe Pa they way they do?  I cannot understand why they are so ready to stone him to death (and let's be clear, Joe Pa's crime was that he knew and did nothing...he did not actually molest these boys) and they do not have the same loathing for what Jackson committed (and Jackson did confess to sleeping with young boys and stated he saw nothing wrong or inappropriate for a man his age to be sleeping with little boys.)  Personally, THEY HAVE NO BUSINESS DISCUSSING THE PENN STATE SITUATION IF THEY CONTINUALLY PROTECT MICHAEL JACKSON.  THEIR ACTIONS OR THEIR THINKING MAKE NO SENSE WHATSOEVER!!!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

HAIL TO THE QUEEN! MADONNA TURNS 53!



Madonna's childhood life in Detroit is explored:


Madonna's year at the University of Michigan (GO Wolverines!) in 1978--interviews with friends and former roommates:


Madonna moves to New York City:


Madonna's involvement in the 1979 film "A Certain Sacrifice" is discussed:


In this segment: the beginnings of Madonna's career as a musician are discussed including the formation of her band Emmy as well as her involvement in Curt Royston's short film 'In Artificial Light':


In this segment: Madonna's time with Camille Barbone's Gotham management company and her struggle to forward her music career (circa 1981-1982):


In this final segment: Madonna hangs at Danceteria, meets Mark Kamins, and gets signed to Sire Records, which begins her ascent to the top of the charts:


Madonna's girl, Lourdes (Lola), is making her mark on the world.  With her mom by her side, Lola has launched a clothing line--Material Girl--found exclusively at Macy's.  The clothes are cool and trendsetting and Lola is beautiful.  The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it?


Madonna and Lola ("Little Star") images:


HAPPY 53RD MADONNA!  YOU CONTINUE TO BE SUCH AN INSPIRATION TO ME!







Tuesday, August 2, 2011

August: Madonna Month

Recently I changed my Facebook profile pic as a tribute to my idol, the Queen of Pop, Madonna, whose birthday is coming up on the 16th!   

Madonna is her self-titled debut album, released in July 1983.  The single "Everybody" is what prompted the much-wanted record deal with Sire. 

I posted the video to "Everybody" on my Facebook wall.  In the following video, Madonna performs her song during "The Girlie Show" live in Japan.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Those Pesky Church Hypocrites!

Yesterday, I prepared Dora's birthday dinner.  She had asked for a ribeye steak dinner and it was goooood!  Happy birthday Bunny!  

I am still elated about the history-making legislation passed by the New York State Senate!  It's made me euphoric.  True to form, the religious fanatics have come out from the landfills to speak their minds.  According to The Advocate, 
"Archbishop Timothy Dolan and the Catholic Church in New York were among the most vocal locals in opposition. Dolan, who had very publicly urged legislators to vote against the bill, said its passage will alter "radically and forever humanity's historic understanding of marriage" and released a statement saying:

"We strongly uphold the Catholic Church's clear teaching that we always treat our homosexual brothers and sisters with respect, dignity, and love. But we just as strongly affirm that marriage is the joining of one man and one woman in a lifelong, loving union that is open to children, ordered for the good of those children and the spouses themselves. This definition cannot change, though we realize that our beliefs about the nature of marriage will continue to be ridiculed, and that some will even now attempt to enact government sanctions against churches and religious organizations that preach these timeless truths."

What a pile of bullshit!  The Church has never treated homosexuals with respect, dignity, and love.  On the contrary, the Church has continuously ridiculed homosexuals and has considered homosexuals as an abomination; a group who most assuredly will rot in a fiery place of torment they call hell for all eternity.  Last time I checked, this attitude does not demonstrate respect, dignity, and love.

Contrary to what Dolan stated above, no one is talking about enacting government sanctions against churches and religious organizations that preach their beliefs about the nature of marriage.  You have your freedom of religion.  You have the freedom to choose the religion of your choice or the freedom not to believe in a god altogether.  It's that simple.  However, we also have a clause in the Constitution regarding the separation of church and state.  The LGBT community does not want to hurt anyone.  They simply want the right to marry who they choose as their life partner.  Besides, don't you think you have to free your Church of all the pedophiles your church hierarchy seems adamant to protect?!?!

Mike Macalusco, the head of a group calling itself Citizens for a Decent Community, labeled gay marriage "a total collapse of morality in New York State” and said the hard-fought amendments intending to protect religious institutions were “baloney.”
Get a life Mike!  If you examine other countries who have extended marriage rights to their LGBT community, you will find their countries to still be in order.  There's no anarchy.  But since you had to talk about morality, then let's go there.  I find the alarming divorce rate sad and atrocious...perhaps immoral.  After all, most of the reasons cited for divorce is "adultery."  Where's your morality now butthead?!?!

Friday, June 24, 2011

EQUALITY in the Greatest City in the World!

The state of New York passed same-sex marriage bill today!!!!!!  New York loves the gays!  New York, you have just endeared yourself to me even more!!!!!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Putting It Behind Me....

I am feeling better since the last time I posted concerning Terrie's death.  I must admit, the shocking news jilted me and left me feeling distraught.  For the first week, she consumed my thoughts and I could not stop crying at the thought of her taking her own life in such a violent manner.  But then, after a whole week, I began thinking of how badly our relationship ended.  I was attending college in order for us to have a financially sound future.  She claimed I stopped paying attention to her so she find it somewhere else.  She found it in another woman.  She kicked me out of our apartment a week before Xmas and moved in her new love interest.  I was hurt.  When she packed my belongings in the torn and weathered cardboard boxes, she said lots of hurtful things...things that have stayed with me all this time and will always stay with me.  I didn't have anywhere to stay so her sister offered me a place to stay and I took it.  For days, I wanted to die.  I didn't want to get up in the mornings.  I wanted to stay in bed, indoors, away from people.  I cried myself to sleep every night wondering what I did wrong.  Really....what I did wrong?  What bullshit!  She was the one who wandered...who was unfaithful.  I remember coming down with the flu.  She never called to see how I was feeling or if I needed any meds.  I felt so alone.  But I managed to drive to one of the local flower shops (it was Valentine's Day) and arrange for a dozen roses to be delivered to her workplace....with a fever.  Later that same day, I asked her about the flowers.  She allowed her new girlfriend to throw them in the trash!  I was hurt!  Time and time again, she filled my head with empty promises of us getting back together.  She was playing and toying with my feelings.  She kept me on a string!  She didn't care what it cost me emotionally or mentally.  I was a total wreck!  She continued to lie to me...deceive me...hurt me.  And I allowed it.  I became the other woman.  She knew I was still in love with her, but it didn't matter.  Terrie was only interested in pleasing herself with no thought to how she made me feel every day and every night.  And when I would call her on it, she was ugly to me.  The words that spewed from her mouth were vicious.  She had no heart.  Incidentally, her relationship with the woman she left me for came to an abrupt end.  Terrie was hurt and devastated.  She was getting a taste of her own medicine.  But I was more than willing to take her back, watching her cry over someone else.  I gave her a place to stay.  Months later, she left me for someone else...again...a man.  She wanted to marry him for his money.  She claimed she was tired of struggling financially.  She hurt me....again.  Eventually, her marriage came to an end, as I knew it would.  It was a farce.  She moved on to another love interest.  She met someone on the Internet, after she promised me we had a future together.  Another lie.  She hurt me....again.  I believed in her.  I thought she could do no wrong.  She played me for a fool.  She would build me up just to let me down.  She told me she loved me.  I was living in confusion.  The chances I gave her were many...more than she deserved.  I was stupid for believing her.  I was stupid, stupid, stupid!  I had had enough.  In October of 1997, I severed my times to her.  I told myself I would never speak to her ever!  And I stuck to my resolve.  When she tried to speak to me before leaving for Kentucky, I refused her the opportunity.  Frankly, I didn't care anymore.  She was nothing more than a liar and a cheat.  She didn't deserved for me to speak to her.  She left.  I carried on and met other people.  I went out with my friends and had a great time.  I began discovering who I was and began liking myself for a change.  Terrie leaving the state was the best thing she ever did for me.  Then I did something I never thought I'd be able to do--I fell in love again.  When Terrie came around...again...trying to reach out to me, I took the opportunity to tell her that she was no longer a passing thought.  She was floored and she cried about it.  She wanted us to remain as friends, but I questioned, "What for?"  She had treated me like shit for so long, why would I want to be her friend?  And I wasn't.  The last time she tried to contact me was in April 2010.  I said no.  She was my past and I wanted her to stay there.  Now, she's gone.  It seems she couldn't keep it together.  Her sister tells me that Terrie indicated she loved me and always had.  Really?  She treated me like shit and had no regard for my feelings.  What's love got to do with it?  In the final analysis, Terrie knows what she did and didn't do, which was precisely why she told her sister karma bit her in the ass.  In no way am I saying Terrie got what she deserved.  I never wished ill will towards her.  I'm just making sense of my anger and resentment towards the news of her passing.  I feel as though she invaded my space...the space I share with my partner.  I stopped shedding tears for her a long time ago and here I was, shedding tears for her...again.  I felt manipulated.  Wow Terrie, even in death!  No more!  What you did was stupid and senseless, especially because you have a 7-year-old son who needed you!  How could you?  I'll admit, the thought of you still lingers in my head, but time will take care of that image.  You will eventually fade away like a flower.  I guess you thought I would never move on...that I had nothing...that I was nothing....that I could never laugh again...that you destroyed my faith in love...that after all you did, I would never find my way...but I did.  Much to my surprise, I didn't need you.  I only needed myself.  I guess you thought that you were strong, but you were weak.  It takes more strength to cry, to admit defeat.  I had truth on my side.  You had deceit.  I stood on my own and survived.  We didn't.  And you didn't either.   

Sunday, June 5, 2011

R.I.P. Terrie (January 31, 1967-May 30, 2011)


On May 30, 2011, my former life partner took her own life.  She was 44-years-old.  The tragic news shook my world.  I am still in shock and disbelief and can't seem to hold back the tears.  The following letter will be placed beside her as she is laid to rest by her two sisters, brother, and son.  The letter is followed by the last song Terrie dedicated to me in 1996, a few months after our relationship ended.
June 5, 2011
Terrie:
This letter is the most difficult letter I have ever had to write.  In fact, this is a letter I wish I didn’t feel compelled to write, but in view of the tragic circumstances, I cannot keep from doing so.  How I wish you had never left this world the way you have chosen to leave it.  How I wish you had never felt the need or desire to want to leave, wrongfully thinking that you were better off gone or that we were all better off without you.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  You were loved and it is my hope that you were aware of that love when you took your last breath.  I don’t understand why you did it and I’m not going to pretend to understand.  I have never understood why you made the decisions you made in life…why you ended our relationship…why you never wanted to try to revive our relationship…why you chose to share your life with people who never had your best interests at heart…why you never allowed anyone to help you…and why you decided to “check out” and the manner with which you did it.  Why?  WHY?  WHY?!?!  You left people who loved you very much namely your son.  I know you know this already, and perhaps, you believed you were doing everyone a huge favor.  Oh my dear old friend, you were so very wrong.  You have left a void in so many people…Seth, Margie, Chad, and Sarah.  To be honest, your death has affected me, too.  And how could it not?  Terrie, you were my universe, my first love, the love of my life, my angel who brought me in from the cold, my anchor during life’s storms, my rock, my strength, you were everything to me.  I loved you with every fiber of my being.  I loved you more than life itself.  There was NOTHING I wouldn’t do for you.  But you turned my world upside down on December 17, 1995.  The pain was horrendous.  I didn’t want to live.  My life had been torn apart.  I was broken.  I wanted to die, but I survived.  I moved on with my life and, in the process, I found someone else to love.  We have been together thirteen years now and I am happy.  I wish you had found the same happiness.  It is now apparent that you did not and I find that disheartening and I am sorry. 
I know you sought my friendship.  We attempted a friendship several times with no success.  When we spoke on the phone, the conversations usually ended with hurt feelings because of rehashing the past.  Terrie, my dear friend, I didn’t want that for either of us.  What was the point in it?  Our breakup was tumultuous enough, why add more hurt?  Our relationship was a chapter in my life I wanted to close. 
And now, you have left an indelible mark in my heart.  My heart hurts because of what you have done to yourself.  And I am left with visions of you ending your life in the violent way you chose to do it.  I know you felt you had your reasons.  You were ripped and bruised and you couldn’t think of better days.  Life was cruel to you.  I know the story.  You wanted the pain and the hurt to end.  Envisioning your lifeless body makes my heart heavy and it makes me want to scream loud enough for you to hear me.  Terrie, can you hear me?  Can you see me?  Can you see my tears?  Can you feel what I feel?  Where are you?  Are you watching everything unfold?  Is it what you wanted to see? 
Margie tells me you felt guilty about the hurt you caused me.  Terrie, the past is the past and it should have stayed there.  I forgave you long ago, but in case you don’t remember, I will do it again….I FORGIVE YOU.  IT’S OKAY.  I SURVIVED.  YOU NO LONGER HAVE TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT THE HURT.  You now have the peace you wanted and we will eventually find ours.  In the meantime, we will think of you and cry for you.  We will remember everything about you.  For what it’s worth, our breakup taught me a great deal about life and how to deal with the ups and downs.  We can’t always control what happens to us, but we can control how we deal with it.  Give yourself credit for being the first person to show me how it felt to be loved because I know you loved me.  But life happens and it throws us a curve ball.  TERRIE, I KNOW YOU LOVED ME.  We had an awesome relationship while we had it.  And I will never forget it…nor you.  

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Our Example, Not Our Power

I was reminded of Osama's death today...someone told me another joke:  Hey there, did you hear about the latest Bin Laden cocktail?  No, man, what's in it?  Two shots and a splash of water!
I suppose these jokes are expected to run rampant but should they?  Most people would no doubt agree...why the hell not?  The man was a monster.  He was responsible for killing thousands.  9/11 and its aftermath was brutal.  We were left with anxiety, uncertainty, and insecurity.  Our innocence was lost.  It spawned a more paranoid style of politics and the Bush administration ran away with it...blank check in tow.  Wars without end surfaced the international scene.  America was running around like a chicken without its head.  And one mistake after another, America lost its stature as world leader.  Therefore, it's not surprising that there were thousands of people in New York City's Times Square cheering and celebrating the death of one man.  It got me thinking, and in the end, I was shaking my head.
Uh...time for a reality check folks!  Not all fear will disappear with one man's death.   Most Americans will tell you, there's a huge difference between good patriotic fun and sinister nationalism and the distinction sets the good 'ol US of A apart from other countries.  Really?
You mean the kind of sinister nationalism that demonizes "aliens" at home and abroad?  You mean the kind of sinister nationalism that stereotypes Muslims (or anyone who "looks" Middle-Eastern) post-9/11?  You mean the kind of sinister nationalism that raises deep suspicion, prejudice, and violence directed against Native Americans, African Americans, Latinos, Japanese Americans, and European immigrants?
I am not denying the fact that Osama Bin Laden was an evil man and was guilty as sin, but how do we find the legal basis for killing him?   Self-defense?  According to a pronouncement by Philip Alston from the UN, "targeted killing can be legal...the killing of suspected terrorists is permissible only in self-defense or in the defense of others."  BUT Alston also chided Washington for "failing to provide a credible public accounting that would clarify whether the Bin Laden raid or, for that matter, the CIA-conducted drone attacks met the standard." 
Could we, then, make Bin Laden into an "enemy combatant?"  We invented the term, but we did it without international law status.  We only invented the term to get around international law while pretending to stay within its bounds.  Since most Americans believe America is an exceptional country, then it's only reasonable that exceptional people create their own rules, right?  Hmm, we would most definitely condemn others for doing it, but hey, they're not exceptional, right?  Aw, but alas, this kind of thinking has it's own consequences.  Really?  What?
Let's just put it this way:  When we make it a habit to exempt ourselves as exceptional people from international standards, in other words, when we (through our actions) tell others "do as I say and not as I do," we give leaders elsewhere (good and bad) a justification for conducting their own kill operations.  The bottom line is:  "We may think we are serving justice, but the more likely consequence is frayed international trust and cooperation and ultimately less security for the U.S."  
Remember, "the world has always been more impressed by the power of our [America's] example than by the example of our power."--President Bill Clinton
Just sayin'.....

Friday, April 15, 2011

Caty's 4th...Happy Birthday!

Caty was born four years ago today.  We brought her home around July/August.  We had decided to stop by PetSmart to look at the kitties...never thinking we were going to adopt a pet.  Adopting a pet was not our intention.  

There were many cats and kittens at the time, meowing and meowing, wanting to be petted.  Only one kitten, however, was rather quiet.  She just looked at us and watched every move we made.  Dora fell in love with her.  She loved the way this kitten just sat so prim and proper, never making a sound.  She wasn't a timid kitten.  She had a happy face.  We brought her home that day and she has been a part of our family for four years now.  

According to the animal rescue representative, Caty is lucky to be alive.  Caty was born with a severe upper respiratory infection.  The mama cat was nowhere to be found when animal rescue found her.  They took her to the vet and immediately began treatment.  Caty had been connected to a breathing machine and she was fighting for her life.  In fact, the vet didn't think Caty would survive the infection.  Thankfully, she did.  Now she graces us with her presence.
Caty (pronounced Katie or Katy...the vowel "a" has a long "a" sound) is a sweet cat.  She has a charming personality.  She's not a timid cat either.  When she hears the doorbell, she quickly runs to the door to see who is at the door.  She meows at our visitors as if she is saying, "I'm so glad to see you."  
 





Caty does not have a mean bone in her body.  She is quite gentle and loves her humans.  She loves her condo, her house, and her toys.  Caty is an indoor cat.  The only time she is outdoors is when we are all out in the patio or backyard.  When we're feeling down and out, she lightens our spirits.  For that, we love her!


HAPPY FOURTH BIRTHDAY CATY!!!!!!
The Naming of Cats
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, or George or Bill Bailey -
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter -
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum -
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover -
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

T S Elliot